the assisted living place she is looking at requires you buy a unit that costs about $175K (others are more expensive, but she cannot go into an apartment or house) and then the cost is $4200 per month. That is the skilled care nursing part of the facility. Her diagnosis is Alzheimer’s so she cannot go into a lower cost facility. From the until purchase price, 95% of that will be refunded to her heirs when she dies. (We are going with the assumption she will stay there until death.)
Other places don’t require a unit purchase and the monthly cost is higher, often between $6K and $7K per month for Alzheimer’s.
That does not include doctor visits, prescription medication and such. It would included meals, laundry, utilities, usually transportation to local stores and sometimes doctor visits, recreational facilities on site and the nursing care you need.
During the retirement planing she and FIL did, knowing that FIL’s cancer was terminal and they planned on how to invest his life insurance to make sure her retirement was comfortable, they always figured that if she needed nursing home care that she could sell the house and that would cover it. What no-one anticipated was that she would develop Alzheimer’s at 76, knowing that both her parents lived past 90 so it is feasible that she may need 15 to 20 years in a skill care nursing home. 20 years at $6K per month is $1.45 million.